If I had a Low Drift Nozzle

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About Tom Wolf (Nozzle_Guy)

Tom Wolf is based in Saskatoon, SK and has 31 years research experience in the spraying business. He obtained his BSA (1987) and M.Sc. (1991) in Plant Science at the University of Manitoba, and his Ph.D. (1996) in Agronomy from the Ohio State University. Tom focuses on practical advice that is research-based to improve the efficiency of producers. He also rides a unicycle to the office most days.

See all posts by Tom Wolf (Nozzle_Guy).

If I had a Low Drift Nozzle

Sung to the tune of “If I had a Rocket Launcher” by Bruce Cockburn

 

Here comes the John Deere sprayer — second time today;

All the insects scatter and hope it goes away;

How many larvae murdered only Dow can say;

If I had a low drift nozzle… I’d make somebody spray.

 

I don’t believe in modes of action and I don’t believe in rates;

I don’t believe in agronomists or their shiny steely spades;

And when I talk with the survivors of that crappy bran bait;

If I had a low drift nozzle… I would calibrate.

 

On canola field margins one hundred thousand wait;

Smash through truck radiators — or some less humane fate;

Cry for bertha armyworm, sprayed with organophosphate;

If I had a low drift nozzle… I would not hesitate.

 

I want to raise every chirp — at least I’ve got to try;

Every time I see them munching, with my compound eyes;

Situation desperate, echoes of the hoppers cry;

If I had a low drift nozzle… Some CCA would die.